My Theories

Love Is Not Blind

In elementary, there was this notebook we called ‘slambook’ which were passed around among students. In this book, there were different questions we would answer like our personal informations, favorites, dislikes, and even random stuff like ‘what is love for you?’ Since I was only a child, I didn’t really know what love means. So to avoid leaving it blank, I would browse through the other pages to check what my classmates have written. And the most common answer I found was ‘Love is Blind’. I asked one of my older classmates why she would say that love is blind? And her answer was, it’s because when you love someone, you no longer care about his looks, attitude and status in life. You would accept all his flaws and understand his shortcomings. You just know you love that person and would not ask why. Hearing that, I thought it was romantic (if my definition of ‘romantic’ was even correct). So growing up, I believed that love is really blind. 

And then I encountered ‘love’. I loved this boy in high school. It was an unrequited love though because he already had someone. (Story in previous post) But still I loved him. Then there was this guy in college I fall in love with. (Story in previous post) He was not that good-looking and not even rich. But nevertheless, I loved him. And then my first boyfriend came. He was all talk but less in action. We barely saw each other and have broken a lot of promises. (Story in previous post). But I was madly in love with him. So you see, love is really blind. 

Then this man came. He was the total opposite of my ideal guy. He was good-looking yes, but that’s all he had. He had the worst temper (still has), had too many past relationships and was an out-of-school guy. But I fall deeply in love with him. I really thought love is indeed blind. That was the proof. I fall in love with someone out of my league. But then loving him made me realize many things. Despite the fact that he was not the ideal guy I dreamed of and despite all his shortcomings, I learned to appreciate every small things that he does for me. When I was at my lowest, he was the one who pulled me up. When I was weak, he was my strength. When I thought there was no one else, he stood by me. He is my brother and friend combined. I realized then that I love him not because my love was blind but because of those attributes I saw in him when I finally learned to look beneath the surface.

Maybe love is not really blind. I was just blinded with what I used to believed in, that I didn’t even tried harder to understand my feelings. Loving makes you see many things. It opens your eyes more to see the beauty in a person, to know them better and to understand them.

Looking back, I realize that maybe my love was never blind. I loved the guy in high school because he was diligent, industrious and helpful; the guy in college because he was thoughtful, caring, and have always made me feel special; and the guy after him because he was humorous, friendly and sweet. There should be a reason why I fall in love with them. I must have seen something that made me feel what I felt. Maybe I was just too young then to understand. 

Love is not blind. It’s just that, despite all the bad things you see in a person, when you love, you will see even the tinniest bits of goodness in him. Accepting and loving people as who they are is not being blind. The world may be against you, but still you love him. It’s because you see something in him that others might not have seen. You are not blind. You just have bigger eyes.

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